Sometimes the moments we feel most lost are the ones in which we find ourselves

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Spartan 300!

The final Spartan 300 workout is on Saturday! I am not excited and nervous about it. I am nervous because I am going to do 95 pounds instead of 65. The only things this will impact is my deadlifts, floor wipers, and increase the weight of my kettle bell. I am not worried about the increase in kettle bell weight because I really enjoy kettle bells and I have done that weight before. The deadlifts will be harder, but again, I have done that weight before and I know that I can physically do it. The thing that worries me is the floor wipers. I am not even 100% sure that I can hold that weight over my head long enough to do the movement. So that worries me. But I know that if I don’t step up and do it now, I am not going to. So even if my time is slow, even if I don’t finish, I am going to give it what I’ve got and hope that is enough. I am also nervous to get my body assessment done. I have not been doing very well. I have been eating pretty well, but I have not been 100% into it. So my weight has just been going up and down up and down. The last week I have figured it out, but it might be too little too late. And since I am trying not to let the scale have so much control over me, I might forgo the weigh in altogether. I know that if it is not what I want it to be, it is going to impact my workout. And the workout is really more important to me at this point. But we shall see. So I will hopefully have good news to post after Saturday and not let the end of this challenge justify falling off the wagon…for the millionth time! I am determined to get there this time, wherever there is.

Friday, June 12, 2009

What's the Deal?

We are down to one week before the Spartan challenge final. I don’t feel like I have done a whole lot. Zachary asked me the other day if I felt stuck, so clearly other people are noticing my lack of forward motion as well. I am not sure what it is. I try to not pay attention to my weight, but it is difficult. I have used it for so long as a measure of my success, that it is hard to get away from that. The scale hasn’t moved in forever. In fact, it often moves up. Despite working out hard 5 or 6 times a week and despite the fact that I eat pretty darn clean. Sure, there is always room for improvement. But all in all, I eat healthy and appropriately. So what gives? I feel like I fight really hard just to maintain, which really worries me about what that means when I move to New York. I am not going to have the time or money to commit to crossfit like I do here. I am going to do it on my own as much as possible, but I know it is not going to be the same. So does that mean I am going to slide backwards? I refuse to believe this is as good as it gets for me in terms of fitness, but I am really struggling to figure out what I have to do to push farther. Maybe the change in workout routine will be a good thing? Maybe it will shock my body back into paying attention and reacting positively to my efforts. I am not discouraged. I am not down and out. Just a little confused about where I am going with all of this and the best road to get there.

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Moving Closer

I am starting to get really excited about going to New York. I am ready to be back in school. I am ready to be taking classes that genuinely interest me. I am ready to be finished working a 9-5 for a while. I am ready to be in a new city having new adventures. I am ready to get out of my comfort zone for awhile and see what I am really made of. Of course, I am nervous. About 2 months ago I would have told you I was 50% excited and 50% terrified. I am no longer terrified, but I am still anxious about the challenges that I know are in store. I am going to miss my husband most of all. It is going to be difficult to be away from him for so long. But we have done it before, I am going to be tremendously busy, and he is so supportive. It will be hard, but I know we can survive a year. I am going to miss my parents and my cat and my friends and my gym!

Now that I am only a few months away from moving, I am trying to make the most out of the time I have in Austin. I am trying to step up my workouts, step up my nutrition. I want to get out and do all the things I love about Austin because I know I am going to miss doing them in New York. I just want to enjoy being here, right now, at this time in my life. Who knows what is in store down the road, but I am certainly ready to find out. I love my life and while I would be perfectly happy if nothing changed, I am thrilled to be given the chance to shake things up and change the course of my life forever.

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Go Hard or Go Home!

There are now less than 3 weeks left in the Spartan Challenge. I will admit, I have not been as “into” it this year as I was last year. I am not sure what it is, but I don’t really feel any different than I do when I am not doing a challenge. I guess it is because I work out just the same and I give Zach my food logs like I was doing before. But I know this is a time to push myself. So with the realization that it is more than half way over and I don’t feel like I have a lot to show for it, I am going to make the next three weeks count.

What am I going to do, you ask? Well for starters:

No more diet soda!
I have started to become too dependent on them (one every few days) and I don’t like it. So no more. Done! They make me feel blah and overly artificially sugared.

Watch less TV! I don’t watch a huge ungodly amount, but I know I could be using my time more wisely. It is too easy to mindlessly eat when I watch TV, so by cutting down I will kill two birds with one stone.

Stay away from the bulk veggies chips and Whole Foods ginger cookies! I can easily trick my mind into thinking these are healthy alternatives to junk food, but they aren’t. So I am going to do without them for the next three weeks in hopes of getting out of the habit of buying them.

Only get a salad from Whole Foods or Central Market once a week. This doesn’t seem like a big deal, but sometimes I get them 3 or 4 times a week. And in addition to being expensive, I eat more than I would if I made a salad at home. Also, I want to work on preparing my own meals, so getting away from these is important.

Be smart about my fat! Mike and Zach have both told me to up my fat, and I went a little crazy with it for awhile. Seriously. So instead of buying huge tubs of almond butter and pounds of almonds, I need to figure out some alternative to still get the fat I need without being tempted to over do it.

Last, but not least, work on pull ups and push ups every day! I want to get a pull up. Just one! And I want to get push ups on my toes. I have been lazy about working on these for whatever reason. Time to step it up.

So hopefully with these changes I will see good results in the next three weeks. I want to drop the weight without losing my strength, so I am going to really work on dialing in and making it happen!