Sometimes the moments we feel most lost are the ones in which we find ourselves

Friday, June 12, 2009

What's the Deal?

We are down to one week before the Spartan challenge final. I don’t feel like I have done a whole lot. Zachary asked me the other day if I felt stuck, so clearly other people are noticing my lack of forward motion as well. I am not sure what it is. I try to not pay attention to my weight, but it is difficult. I have used it for so long as a measure of my success, that it is hard to get away from that. The scale hasn’t moved in forever. In fact, it often moves up. Despite working out hard 5 or 6 times a week and despite the fact that I eat pretty darn clean. Sure, there is always room for improvement. But all in all, I eat healthy and appropriately. So what gives? I feel like I fight really hard just to maintain, which really worries me about what that means when I move to New York. I am not going to have the time or money to commit to crossfit like I do here. I am going to do it on my own as much as possible, but I know it is not going to be the same. So does that mean I am going to slide backwards? I refuse to believe this is as good as it gets for me in terms of fitness, but I am really struggling to figure out what I have to do to push farther. Maybe the change in workout routine will be a good thing? Maybe it will shock my body back into paying attention and reacting positively to my efforts. I am not discouraged. I am not down and out. Just a little confused about where I am going with all of this and the best road to get there.

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